February 2012
8 posts
Episode 14: Happy Birthday, Margot Burgess
--------: 12:46 PM
LouisTheCat: rick
RickDickens77: What's up
LouisTheCat: hi rick
LouisTheCat: haaaaaaaappy caturday
LouisTheCat: lol get it
RickDickens77: No.
LouisTheCat: ok well see its like saturday
LouisTheCat: but instead of sat
RickDickens77: I was kidding, I get it.
LouisTheCat: pretty funny right
LouisTheCat: i made it up
RickDickens77: i know a whole Internet's worth of people who might argue with that
LouisTheCat: which part
RickDickens77: both.
LouisTheCat: rude
--------: 1:23 PM
LouisTheCat: rick
LouisTheCat: rick
LouisTheCat: rick
RickDickens77: what
LouisTheCat: why are you at work today anyway
RickDickens77: Remember what happened earlier this week?
LouisTheCat: go on
RickDickens77: When you freaked out and I had to come home.
LouisTheCat: can you be more specific
RickDickens77: The incident with the toilet.
LouisTheCat: refresh my memory
RickDickens77: Lou. You flooded my bathroom. Do you seriously not remember this?
LouisTheCat: oh that
LouisTheCat: sure i remember that
LouisTheCat: what i dont remember is thanking you for rescuing sgt mcfuzzies
LouisTheCat: and mr beaniebutt
LouisTheCat: and happy carrot
LouisTheCat: and mrs beaniebutt
LouisTheCat: so thank you rick
LouisTheCat: though i cant seem to find any of them now
RickDickens77: I'm sure they'll turn up. Anyway
RickDickens77: To deal with the half-inch of water running down my hall
RickDickens77: I had to make another trade with my boss to come in to work on the weekend.
LouisTheCat: really
LouisTheCat: you should work on your bargaining skills rick
LouisTheCat: or let me do it
LouisTheCat: i could have that guy asking you to go home
RickDickens77: I don't doubt it.
LouisTheCat: so when will you be back
RickDickens77: Hopefully in the next couple of hours.
--------: 2:49 PM
LouisTheCat: rick
RickDickens77: Lou, what the hell just happened
LouisTheCat: rick you gotta see this man
LouisTheCat: there are police cars and fire trucks in the street
RickDickens77: So I've heard, the neighbor just called
LouisTheCat: oh yeah which one
RickDickens77: Funny enough, it was Mr. Burgess, from the house across the street
RickDickens77: The one with all of the emergency vehicles in front of it
LouisTheCat: what a coincidence
LouisTheCat: so how is he anyway
LouisTheCat: we never hang out
LouisTheCat: nice guy
LouisTheCat: weird dog though
RickDickens77: He's angry, Lou. I think you know why.
LouisTheCat: the sirens probably
LouisTheCat: very annoying
RickDickens77: No, he seems pretty upset about his daughter's birthday party being ruined
LouisTheCat: oh no what happened
RickDickens77: You know what happened! You were there!
LouisTheCat: no no i must have left before that
LouisTheCat: everything was pretty awesome when i was there
RickDickens77: Not from what I heard.
LouisTheCat: hmmmm
LouisTheCat: no pretty sure it was great
LouisTheCat: rick they had a pony
LouisTheCat: a pony rick
LouisTheCat: and a petting zoo
LouisTheCat: rick they had a magician
LouisTheCat: super cool rick
RickDickens77: Sounds terrific.
LouisTheCat: oh and cake of course
RickDickens77: Let's start with that pony.
LouisTheCat: dont hire that pony
LouisTheCat: cute but very jumpy
LouisTheCat: he went nuts and busted through their fence
RickDickens77: So I heard.
RickDickens77: Do you think maybe the pony only became jumpy when you attacked it?
LouisTheCat: first of all im not interested in philosophical dead ends
LouisTheCat: second
LouisTheCat: attack is an unfair word
LouisTheCat: i was grooming him
LouisTheCat: its a thing
RickDickens77: Apparently you were hanging upside down from his neck
LouisTheCat: right
RickDickens77: This is grooming?
LouisTheCat: if you do it right it is
LouisTheCat: i am nothing if not thorough
RickDickens77: And the part after that?
LouisTheCat: very thorough
RickDickens77: Moving on: is there anything you need to tell me about the petting zoo?
LouisTheCat: it was wonderful
LouisTheCat: adorable
RickDickens77: And...?
LouisTheCat: thats all
RickDickens77: Are you sure there wasn't an incident, perhaps involving a goat
LouisTheCat: hmmm no i dont remember a goat
LouisTheCat: or a sheep
RickDickens77: I didn't ask you about the sheep yet.
LouisTheCat: well i dont remember one
RickDickens77: And you don't remember opening the gate.
LouisTheCat: nope
RickDickens77: And you don't remember chasing a goat and a sheep out of the pen and into the Burgess house.
LouisTheCat: seems like id remember that
RickDickens77: And you don't remember herding them around the kitchen on a terrified rampage that ended with them both diseappearing through the front door covered in a variety of beverages and dips.
LouisTheCat: if i did remember that
LouisTheCat: which i do not
LouisTheCat: i have to think the screaming people had more to do with that
LouisTheCat: and herding would be the wrong word
LouisTheCat: at the time i was playing just dance on the xbox with the kids
RickDickens77: You can't just go hang out in other peoples' houses, Lou
LouisTheCat: i was made for loooovin lou baaaby
LouisTheCat: lou was made for loooovin meeeee
RickDickens77: So whatever happened after they got into the house is somehow not your fault.
LouisTheCat: were talking about pretty dumb animals here rick
RickDickens77: I'll say.
LouisTheCat: i dont think i like your tone
RickDickens77: Next item on the agenda
RickDickens77: It sounds like maybe we owe a magician and the parents of fifteen children an apology as well.
LouisTheCat: for what
RickDickens77: There was something about a rabbit?
LouisTheCat: i dont see what that has to do with me
RickDickens77: I don't know, all anyone saw was you leaping out of a hat
RickDickens77: followed by the magician cursing like a sailor in three different languages, packing up his things, and storming out
LouisTheCat: woah woah woah
LouisTheCat: i did that man a favor
LouisTheCat: and in fact i think we all learned a powerful lesson about whether bunnies should have chickens as pets
RickDickens77: Wait, what?
LouisTheCat: im just saying that guy isnt blameless here
LouisTheCat: just think how his bunny felt
LouisTheCat: or the chicken i guess
LouisTheCat: yeah
LouisTheCat: mostly the chicken
RickDickens77: I don't understand.
LouisTheCat: maybe dont get into it
RickDickens77: Right. Moving on to the cake.
LouisTheCat: ok hold up
LouisTheCat: i know what youre thinking and the fire trucks werent because of me
RickDickens77: Why don't you explain to me what happened then.
LouisTheCat: so this bald guy set the cake on fire right
RickDickens77: Probably Mr. Burgess. Lighting candles.
LouisTheCat: you know me and candles
RickDickens77: I do.
LouisTheCat: anyway i see this little kid getting waaaaaaay too close
RickDickens77: Probably Margot, blowing them out.
LouisTheCat: and so basically i saved her life
RickDickens77: By screeching and leaping onto her face.
LouisTheCat: hero is as hero does rick
RickDickens77: And what's this about the table getting knocked over
LouisTheCat: ok that was that weird dog
LouisTheCat: thats what im talking about man
LouisTheCat: i save this girl and she starts screaming
LouisTheCat: probably because it just hit her how close she just came to dying
LouisTheCat: and the dog freeeeeeaaaks out
LouisTheCat: plows straight through the table
RickDickens77: And that's when the fire started?
LouisTheCat: i was on my way out at the time
LouisTheCat: didnt want to overstay my welcome
RickDickens77: Of course.
LouisTheCat: politeness is key
LouisTheCat: but yes i heard people yelling fire as i was leaving
LouisTheCat: and frankly im not surprised
LouisTheCat: they had that crinkly paper ribbon everywhere
LouisTheCat: not only a fire hazard but terribly tacky
LouisTheCat: also another thing about that dog
LouisTheCat: it licks itself constantly
LouisTheCat: its disgusting
LouisTheCat: makes a gross noise
LouisTheCat: like a cow with a hair on its tongue
LouisTheCat: or a plunger in a toilet full of peanut butter
LouisTheCat: or you eating noodles
RickDickens77: Okay Lou, I get it.
--------: 3:44 PM
LouisTheCat: so all of this has me thinking
LouisTheCat: what are you planning for my birthday party
RickDickens77: I am locking you in a very small cage.
RickDickens77: Possibly forever.
--------: RickDickens77 has gone offline
LouisTheCat: i was thinking clown
